Friday, November 20, 2009

Nothing Gets Me Hotter Than A Hairy Man Wearing A Cravat

I read the sex scenes in romance novels at the public library to determine which one I'm going to check out.

True story.

Right now I'm reading a dirty version of Pride and Prejudice. For reals.

I'm having a hard time deciding which Mr. Darcy I want to picture while reading the naughty parts....

The original....very Firthy.

Or the latest version...very yummy and hairy and Englishy.


Hot, right??? Like the grown-up woman's version of Edward and Jacob. I mean, all I need is to see one of them with vampire fangs and I'll orgasm all over this computer.

Hmmm. Which takes longer to rip off...a cravat or high-waisted man pants??


Psssst, Captain Carl....since I'm out of town for a few days, could you maybe grow your hair out a little and pick up an overcoat and a beseeching look by the time I get home? Just wonderin'...no reason, really.

ahem.



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26 comments:

  1. Little Ms BloggerNovember 20, 2009 at 10:17 AM

    Both are hot, but wonder if this will top the book you read with the vampire/werewolf 3 some...

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  2. AnonymousNovember 20, 2009 at 10:46 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. UnknownNovember 20, 2009 at 10:47 AM

    I say give me both and we can get have a real party

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  4. kate sweetenNovember 20, 2009 at 10:52 AM

    My vote is for Mr. Darcy #2. Yum. I can only picture Mr. Darcy #1 as Mark Darcy from Bridget Jones and he always struck me as kind of an uptight wiener. Which I guess the other Mr. Darcy is, too...I'm so confused.

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  5. decemberbabyNovember 20, 2009 at 11:18 AM

    Delurking to say that I've been ready naughty P&P fan fiction for a while now... definitely Colin Firth. Definitely.

    (which sequel are you reading? Have you read "Mr Darcy takes a wife"?)

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  6. decemberbabyNovember 20, 2009 at 11:18 AM

    sorry, that should be "reading", not "ready"...

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  7. Miss YvonneNovember 20, 2009 at 11:30 AM

    @LittleMsBlogger: Maybe a vampire/Darcy threesome!!

    @Comment deleted: How dare you, sir!

    @Heather: I like the way you think. Naughty.

    @kate: The whole point of Darcy is that he is an uptight weiner. Those are the best kind of weiners.

    @Ed Adams: ....yourself.

    @decemberbaby: Am so glad you delurked just so that I could find out about Mr. Darcy takes a wife".

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  8. justmakingourwayNovember 20, 2009 at 11:34 AM

    I can't believe I have missed out on this entire naughty P&P genre! Good smut is hard to find.

    My Word Ver is "laters". That makes me laugh for some reason.

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  9. AtYourCervixNovember 20, 2009 at 11:43 AM

    Hmmm, sounds like a must read to add to my list.

    The second one is definitely hotter, BTW.

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  10. Steam Me Up, KidNovember 20, 2009 at 11:52 AM

    A SERIES of naughty P&P?? You teach me so much and you bring me such joy, Miss Yvonne.

    My vote is for when they invent a Mr. Darcy who doesn't have sensitive pussy feelings.

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  11. Steam Me Up, KidNovember 20, 2009 at 11:53 AM

    Also, I can't get "At Your Cervix" up there out of my head. I re-read your post title as "Nothing gets me hotter than a hairy man wearing a cervix." Gah.

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  12. dianeNovember 20, 2009 at 12:45 PM

    I've always had a thing for the first guy, but not as Mark Darcy.

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  13. Mandy_FishNovember 20, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    That's one of my favorite books. What the hell book are you reading now? We need title/author. Thank you.

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  14. Mandy_FishNovember 20, 2009 at 1:36 PM

    Oh, and P.S. Colin Firth all the way. The other guy looks like he cleans Mr. Darcy's stables.

    Pfft.

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  15. erinNovember 20, 2009 at 2:42 PM

    Colin Firth all the way. Times one thousand.

    kate says he seems like an uptight weiner. That speaks multitudes.

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  16. erinNovember 20, 2009 at 2:43 PM

    Oh. I just read that you already responded to kate in the same way I did.

    I'm a fool, but a fool for you. :)

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  17. I'm Katie.November 20, 2009 at 3:35 PM

    Oooohhhhh Mr. Darcys. I'm with Mandy: title and author, already! NOW! I mean... please?

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  18. AtYourCervixNovember 20, 2009 at 3:46 PM

    Steam: ROFLMAO!!

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  19. KristineNovember 20, 2009 at 7:53 PM

    YUMMMMMMY Colin Firth.

    James Spader should be cast in the next period film. Just saying. (That I want to see him naked, that is. That's what I'm saying.)

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  20. Joanna JenkinsNovember 20, 2009 at 11:09 PM

    Hard to say, Colin Firth is pretty cute.
    Have a great weekend.
    xo

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  21. November 21, 2009 at 9:44 AM

    Definitely Number 1 - but I'm not really a hairy chest lovin' lulu.....

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  22. AnonymousNovember 21, 2009 at 3:15 PM

    You have to watch The Tudors.....

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  23. The Peach TartNovember 23, 2009 at 8:30 AM

    #2 seems more naughty which is the way I like my men

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  24. KurtNovember 23, 2009 at 12:06 PM

    If this were an SAT question:

    Firth is to filth, as ___ is to Your Mom.
    a)Easy
    b)Whorish
    c)Slutty
    d)Lemon Pie

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  25. AnonymousNovember 23, 2009 at 3:26 PM

    I always picture James McAvoy. I know he wasn't in Pride and Prejudice but he was in that other Jane Austen movie, so, kind of relevant.

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  26. ____jNovember 23, 2009 at 9:48 PM

    I would go with the first one. Just sayin'.

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