Wednesday, February 22, 2012

And That's How Eric Stoltz And 70's Porno Music Got Me Fired

Me: Hello?
Him: Hey baby.

*70’s porno music playing*

Me: What the hell is that?
Him: Oh that? Just a little baby makin’ music to start your day off right.
Me: Ummmm…..what?
Him: Okay, so I was on YouTube searching for Eric Stoltz in Back To The Future and…
Me: Wait, Eric Stoltz was in Back To The Future?
Him: No, he was the original Marty and they filmed for like 5 weeks or something and then they replaced him with Michael J. Fox.
Me: No way. How do you know that?
Him: Everyone knows that.
Me: No they don’t.
Him: Everyone but you knows that.
Me: Ohmygod, I’m trying to picture him in that movie and it’s kind of freaking me out.
Him: Why?
Me: There’s no way Eric Stoltz can pull off a puffy vest.
Him: Well anyway, so that’s what I was searching for and you know how it goes on YouTube. You click a link and then watch that video and then click on another link and then watch that video and then click on another link and boom! You find a band that does remakes of 70’s porn soundtracks.
Me: Are you sure you’re not just watching porn?
Him: Not yet.

*more 70’s porno music playing*

Me: Huh. That could be either 70’s porn or 70’s cop show.
Him: Just call me Ponch.
Me: I never realized how versatile that music is. You can chase bad guys or fuck bad guys to that music.
Him: Awesome, right?
Me: All you need is the right moustache and some bell bottoms and you’re good to go for either.
Him: Hell, all I have to do is shave off my goatee and I’ll have the moustache.
Me: I wonder if they make bell bottoms in your size.
Him: *giggling*
Me: What?
Him: Oh, nothing. *more giggling*
Me: *yelling* YOU BETTER NOT HAVE A PORN MOUSTACHE WHEN I GET HOME TONIGHT!
Every Co-worker in my office: *awkward silence*
Me: *whispering* Damn it.
Him: Well, my work here is done.

10 comments:

Houston (aka) Tots said...

HA! We took Sadie to an 80's themed skate party over the weekend.

Guess who was rockin' the 80's porn-stache!!!

I'll give you two hints, he's got two thumbs and he's THIS GUY!!!!

Lost.in.Idaho said...

...and now I'm going to have the soundtrack form Boogie Nights in my head for the rest of the evening...

...and bush. Hairy hairy 70's afro-bush. Bow-chicka-wow-wow!

Nina Patricia @ The Adventures of Nina Patricia said...

bwahahahahahaha
Now I'm picturing Erick Strada from Chips making a porno on his motorcycle

Mrs BC said...

Oh, come on - '70s Porn Staches are hot! Just grab those handle bars & go baby!
Also - I didn't know that about Eric Stoltz, & I had the biggest crush on him, so thanks for sharing.
xx

Logical Libby said...

Did Eric Stoltz have a porn mustache?

Venom said...

It would just ice the cake if you'd gotten home and he had actually done it.
heh heh
I would laugh.

diane said...

I didn't know that was real, just thought it was a weird thing in one of the Fringe episodes. So does he have a new face-hair style? Or bell bottoms? They should be striped bell bottoms, that's extra sexy.

Brett Minor said...

I didn't know Eric Stoltz was in Back to the Future either.

Joanna Jenkins said...

You two are hysterical
:-)
xo jj

Bob The Water Cat said...

Had to google Eric Stoltz. But I'm totally down with the music.

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