Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Whip It Good

Okay so here's the thing. I love to eat. LOVE. I have a beautiful relationship with my meals. That first taste, especially when it's something special or if I'm really hungry, is pure bliss.

Unfortunately, I suck at cooking. I have cooking anxiety. I'm always afraid that I'm going to under cook the meat, so I end up drying it out. I have no vision for it. I must have a recipe and I MUST follow it exactly. Lucky for me, I have a husband who, if allowed, would spend all day, every day in the kitchen making up new dishes. In other words, I never have to make a meal. Unless, like this week, he is gone on a business trip and then I eat nothing but cereal and sandwiches.

But I can bake. I can bake like the wind. For some reason, the fear that plagues me with dinner planning disappears when it comes to desserts. I am not an elaborate baker. I prefer to use a mix as a base for brownies and cakes. My cookies are from simple recipes. But it's always good. Probably because I've always had a powerful sweet tooth. One of my most vivid memories from my early years is visiting my Grandma and figuring out that if I called anything sweet my "medicine" she would think it was adorable and give it to me. And that's how my love affair with COOL WHIP Whipped Topping started. Every visit to my Grandma resulted in 4-5 spoonfuls of my medicine.  

*sigh* I still love that stuff. I figured out early on when raising my kiddos that a little COOL WHIP on top of their fruit at meals made the whining go away and quick. OMG, the whining. I wasn't prepared for it. They're all "I hate strawberriesssssssss!" and I'm all "You told me you loved them last week" and they're all "They make me barfffffff!" and I'm all "Just eat them" and they're all *choke gag* and I'm all "Oh for Pete's sake, here" and then the COOL WHIP comes out and everyone is happy and smiling and suddenly we're in a Disney movie. And then they finish their strawberries and I tell them to take out the trash and then we're in that horror movie with the little kid who crawls out of the well and then I don't sleep for a week.

My kiddos are all grown up now (if you call being 20 years old in college and still not remembering to brush your teeth every day) but that's totally fine with me because it means when I make stuff like this I get to eat all of it myself.

This? Is a whoopie pie.

And the angels sang in the heavens.

So I have a friend who mentioned I should try making my own whoopie pies out of cake mix. So I started googling and found so many recipes that looked amazing. But I'm not really a heavy frosting fan, so I thought maybe exchanging the more traditional filling with COOL WHIP would be fun to try. These are the only ingredients I used.

A devil's food cake mix, 2 eggs and two tubs of COOL WHIP. Instead of the oil called out on the mix box, I used a tub of COOL WHIP instead. Sounds weird? I thought so too.

You guys.

They are AH-MAZE-ING. They are light and sweet and oh did I forget to mention that I mixed a tiny bit of the dry cake mix with another tub of COOL WHIP and spread it in between two of the pies and then I passed out from how good they taste?

This took me all of 45 minutes total, not counting the 30 minutes I let the dough chill in the refrigerator before I baked the pies. 45 minutes. Everyone has 45 minutes in their day to make something this super yum and super easy (I'm looking at you, lady in my office who brags about how she bakes all weekend for her kid's girl scout troop meetings while staring at me and my Twinkie all judge-y faced).

I figure this post is like my community service to the internet for all the swearing and inappropriate talk I do here.  Hey everyone, make this and you'll experience one minute of pure bliss followed by 10 minutes of pure amazement over how kind and generous Miss Yvonne was to share her COOL WHIP whoopie pie recipe with you. You're welcome.

Now I'm off for my last dose of medicine.

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Kristine said...

I need a poster of that last picture. Those look DELISH.

journeyingrick said...

again, a hilarious post. as ever. and i'm glad the cool whip makes things all better!!!

Gia said...

That looks delicious. I should not have read this. Now I'm hungry. Argh.

SherilinR said...

whipped cream is the stuff that food dreams are made of. and i can't eat crap anymore if i want to be a skinny biotch for a wedding this summer, but if i could, i would totally made that whoopie pie. maybe i'll just dream about it tonight.

Chris said...

You aren't a heavy frosting fan? Good gosh woman what the heck is wrong with you???!!!

I abhor cooking. Thank God for men like Captain Carl and my hubby. The kids would starve if it weren't for them! haha Bring on the cereal!

Chris said...

Looks yummy. My wife lives on yogurt and frozen pizza when I'm gone. She can cook. She would just rather not.
Bake like the wind? Nice.

Hollypops said...

Kitchen. Soul. Mate.

I can cook 1 pot/pan things (chili, lasagne, slap a roast/carrots/taters in the crock pot) but I'm not a cook either. Didn't eat red meat for 10 yrs. ( I do now bc, y'all...burgers and fast food, yay!) so, I think I just lost the skill of timing things well.

But, like you, I can bake like the wind, doctor up any mix and decorate the shit outta some desserts. I was also known back in the day to make a mean "special" brownie, alas not so much in the way of connections. Guess I have to wait til my kids are in college to master that one again.

Cool Whip is the stuff of Gods. Like it so much better than the whippet aerosol whipped topping stuff out there. Don't care if it's oil not cream or whatever. Redneck in me likes margerine in a tub better than butter too..sue me. I remember a pie we used to make when I was a kid that was pretty much just Cool Whip, Marachino Cherries, pineapple and slap that bad boy into a chocolate shell...ambrosia.

Totally making Yo Mamma's Whoopee this weekend. May even try a pumpkin version knock off if I can get it down.

Kimber Leszczuk. said...

That sounds so good!!! I am not a fan of store bought packaged frosting so I either make my own or alter it. I alter it by adding a block of cream cheese, a stick of butter and some vanilla. LOL WHen I make frosting homemade I use confectioners sugar, milk, and butter. It is usually lighter or tastes way better than the packaged crap from the stores. :) I can't wait to try your whoopie pie recipe. :)

Joanna Jenkins said...

In my family, Cool Whip is a food group all it's own. There is always one in the fridge and one on stand-by in the freezer.

I'll be baking all night now :-)

THANKS, xo jj

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