Once upon a time, there was a woman named Kim. Kim had a blog, and she named that blog Yellow Trash Diaries. Kim was hilarious and she totally got over 100 followers because of how awesome she was and also because a nice lady at another blog that had something to do with your mom asked her legions (legions!) of followers to share the love over at Kim's blog. Kim also had some things in her possession that were magical and wonderful. Special, lovely somethings. And yet, Kim chose never to use these somethings. Instead, Kim kept the somethings hidden away in a closet, where they were forgotten about. Until one fateful day when Kim rediscovered the somethings and decided to bestow them upon the fair maiden, Miss Yvonne. And Miss Yvonne said that the somethings were good and the villagers rejoiced. The end.
Dudes! Kim has some penis straws and she's giving them to me. Just because I asked. And maybe also because I told her I would use them when the Kiddo's friends came over so I could do inappropriate things and embarrass 17 year old boys. Apparently Kim likes sick and deranged people. Yea for me!
I'm gonna suck the shit out of those bastards.
I promised Courtney over at Whiskey Girl that I would send her one so that we can have a contest to see who can suck the most. My vote is for Kurt's mom, but I think I'll be a strong second.
Get ready for a good ole fashioned suck-off, y'all!!
On Becoming My Grandmother
4 months ago